Commentary Writing 1st

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1sGuGYiEVzCO2x1s9TKg-XzrG8Ql-4_hAfte41zfwSWE/edit?usp=sharing

SNO online papers

I Am Norm Club Celebrates Diversity

Cedar Park High School-Cedar Park,TX

1.  Gillian Corona wrote this story.
2. The story is about a club called I Am Norm that switches up special ed and regular classes to promote diversity.
3. "If you are a sweet, kind, patient person, as described by Hunter, wanting to go in and spend some time with some fellow classmates, you can use the DEN portal to sign up for Brenda McCall’s DEN in AW 102 on Fridays." This quote shows the writers direct opinion about the club is a positive one, as she refers to the people that join are kind and sweet.
4. No, the writer only discussed the positive side of the topic.
5. No, their opinion on the topic stayed consistent throughout the story.
6. Yes, there are quotes from from a senior student named Chloe Hunter.
7. They wrote in 2nd as the writer did not use I or Me nor did they used any pronouns.

Personal Essays

1. She said be sure your essays is about something that you feel strongly or passionate about.
2. She said to support your opinion with facts and statistics.
3. Personal essays contain a personal perspective, Connect your opinions to personal examples and make sure to get the readers attention by using hooks.

CE 2.2

Short Answer

1. She had to pay $1,840 in fines to drop the charges.

2. They must get a clean health bill from an FAA approved doctor.

3. Leander has called for $454 million.  Bastrop has called for $88.5 million. Lake Travis has called for $253 million. Eanes has also called for $253 million.

4. A city could see 50,000 jobs and $5 Billion of investment.

5. A repository of over 10,000 memes, short stories and urban legends.

Long Response

1. This story is about a new technology being introduced into the streets of austin, the self-driving car. This story talks about how the self-driving car is safer then human driven cars, because robots can't get drunk or angry and how this allows people with  disabilities to experience more freedoms.

2. The people who would benefit from the self-driving car are people who can't drive on their own, people who are blind or amputees.

3. Personally I would feel more safe if I was driving a car and others were driving cars because I wouldn't want to be In a machine going 60-80 mph and one that I can't control. With other cars I can go at my own pace and I would think not all machines are perfect so few driving cars are bound to crash.

4. No I do no think driving cars will be a big innovation because more people will stick to driving on their own and if not they'll just use public transportation.

Prompt Shoot 1

Square

Metal

Happy

Bowie

CE 2.1

1. The four historical figures are Ben Franklin, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and the statue of liberty.
2. 2 out of the 4 specialty clinics are The Health Institute and the Mulva clinic for Neurosciencies.
3. She is sueing them because they copied her design.
4. Nick Medlna was the Bowie football player.
5. I would want to see Happy death day.

Long response

1. The writers direct stance on science is that he thinks we should value science more in our everyday lives.

2&3. I got that opinion from paragraph 1 when he says "Its alarming that many members of society distrust and question science".

4. He says if people trusted science we'd have advanced earlier and he proves this by telling us about the remarkable progress of cancer treatment caused by science.

5. He ended it by being hopeful by saying "lets widely choose to provide real incentives for work".

6. Yes I think he came across and very intellegent and he provided alot of facts.

7. Yes I think we should trust known and tested theorys so we can better our society.

The Dispatch Evaluation

Page 3

Administration revises the incentive plan

Who: Bowie administration

What: A new incentive.

Where: Bowie High School.

When: 2017-2018 school year.

Why: To get students to come to class

How: Students can skip some of the finals if they have a good attendance.

This story is about how the Bowie administration revised the incentive plant to allow two incentives. These incentives were sort of passes that allowed students to miss finals as long as they had good attendance and good grade, but the problem was with only one incentive if students got sick there is nothing they could do about it. That is why Bowie decided to revise the plan and allow two incentives, so if students got sick or missed class because of something they can't control they wouldn't be punished.

Ann Widner, Emily Leeke, Shikha Patel, Emily Robinett. They are direct quotes.

Yes there are transition sentences that are opinions. The opinions are that they are in heavy favor of the new, revised incentive plan rather than the old one.

Yes it sums up the story because its about the revised incentive plan and how it has affected students.

Bowie organizations soar to new heights with drones on campus

Who: Bowie students.

What: Bowie High school is now implementing drones.

Where: Bowie High School

When: 2017-2018 school year

Why: So students can be more successful

How: Students are being taught how to fly and use drones and they are using them for photography and other extra cirricular activities.

This story is about how bowie students and teachers are starting to implement drones in their classes. These drones are used for photography, football and even JROTC has its own drone course.

Chanel Dobrzenki, Andrew Nourse, Nick Moczygemba and Luke Leifker. They use direct quotes because its actually what they said.

I didn't find any opinions they use facts during the transition sentences.

Yes, I feel it smmarizes the story because it shows how bowies starting to use drones.

Page 2

Technology due to arrive in January

Who: Bowie Students
What: Bowie students getting their own personal chromebooks.
Where: Bowie High School
When: 

Earthquake Story

Who: Jennifer Vu, Mike Beamer, Penny Gertz
What: San Fransisco Earthquake
Where: San Fransisco, California
When: Monday 8:12 AM
Why: The Hayward Fault
How: The fault moved

The Earthquake Story

It was an average Monday, people were waking and getting ready for the day. The sun was bright and people were Eating breakfast and going to work until 8:12 were one of the biggest earthquakes recorded struck the city of San Fransisco. The Hayward Fault that ran under the nearby hills had moved causing a 6.2 magnitude earthquake.

 Mike Bremer was eating his breakfast when the earthquake struck.

 

"I was eating my breakfast when the room started rolling. I dove under the table just as I heard an explosion outside and a chunk of cement flew through my window. Thats when screaming started across the street" Said Mike Bremer.

Jennifer Vu a PI officer at Hayward fire department talked about the Auto Supply shop that collapsed and killed 2 people.

 

"Twenty-one fire personnel, 12 police officers and 5 red cross members responded to the building collapse, some arriving within 4 minutes. Names of the dead killed by the collapsing structure are being withheld pending notifications of families" said Vu.

 

Penny Gertz a scientist from the U.S Geological Survey responded to the earthquake.

" It was a strong one, it had a magnitude of 6.2 on the Richter scale. It occurred on the Hayward fault which runs under the nearby hills" Said Gertz

The Earthquake also wasn't just confined to San Fransisco.

"The earthquake could be felt as far north as Redding and as far south as Los Angeles" Said Gertz.

They were also many injuries caused by the Earthquake.

" Three of the six people near the building were injured so bad that they needed hospitalization, and there were many more hospitalized people all around San Fransisco" Said Vu.

Huntington Story

Who: Janice Jones
What: Accidental gun injury and evidence for animal abuse
Where:  Barstow, California
When: 10 Pm,
Why: Her dog knocked off her gun off the counter& there is a lot of evidence on the dog that points to abuse.
How: Cig burns and malnutrition.

Huntington Story

In Barstow, California Janice Jones, who was 53, got shot by her 9mm handgun when her dog knocked it off the table.  The event happened on Wednesday around 10PM and she was rushed to the Huntington Beach Hospital. When paramedics investigated the home of the old lady they found heavy signs of malnutrition and abuse of her dog.
 On the dog there were cig burns on it's forehead and it was grossly skinny, obvious signs of abuse. The Pomeranian named Tombo was placed in custody of the Huntington Beach animal control officers. Janet NGO is filing animal abuse charges against Jones.

 "It could have been worse, the bullet was 2 inches from the gas tank" said Rye.

When the paramedics investigated the home they found the abused dog.

" We walked in the home and one of the first things we noticed was the dog, It had cigarette burns all over its forehead and it was skinny, like it had never been fed. It was really sad and we took it into custody soon after we saw it" Said paramedic Bill Smith.

Janet NGO is filing together a animal abuse case against Jones.

"Its just horrible, how can anyone treat their own dog like that. No wonder the dog knocked the gun off the table" said Janet NGO representative Hill Harper.

Free Write

The nation is controlled by the cartel, a nation that exports drugs by the ton, a nation so corrupt that free speech is confronted by torture and death. It hasn't always been this way though, the small South American country of Equador used to peaceful, beautiful even until the violent & ruthless drug cartels from Mexico and Colombia found out about the dense rainforests and unpatrolled coastline that fed into the Carribean Sea. At first it was the colombians, small remanents that followed Pablo Escobar and His ruthless Medellin cartel.
 They started in the rainforests with their cocaine processing super labs which converted the coca leaves into tons and tons of powdered cocaine. Business was going good until they ran into a problem, the coca farmers couldn't keep up with the Colombians demands so they gave up. The cartel was stuck until they realized the coca plant is legal in Bolivia and Peru, so they opened giant farms in those countries and had the leaves smuggled to Equador, were its processed then smuggled into the US.
 At first the US didn't notice, they were too concerned with terorists and the Mexican cartels, but with the increased arrests due to cocaine possession and the amount of money being lost, of course the US would notice. At first they didn't know where it was coming from, but with the increasing stops at the Equador border they knew where to start. They sent the DEA down there to tear up the country in search of the cartel.
 Now the beautiful country is gone. All there is a rainforest thats the stage for one of the most bloodiest drug wars in history. Trees and houses go up in flames everyday, the cartel kidnaps and tortures people who talk against them and gunshots replace the sound of birds. Its a terrible time, a terrible time indeed.

The Car Accident

Who: Roger Clementine, John Jacob Jinglcheimer-Smith, Melba Jinglcheimer-Smith.
What: Car Accident 
Where: Intersection of First Street and Slaughter Lane.
When: Between 4:45 and 4:55 Pm
Why: Roger who was 13 collided with the old couple.
How: He was driving on the wrong lane.

"We were just driving to Walmart to get some food then I see the car coming directly at us" Said John Jacob Jinglcheimer-Smith.

John Jacobs suffered a serious head injury and was is critical condition.

Rob Smith the paramedic at the scene said this." We were lucky, John had a serious head injury and if we got there a little later he could've suffered at stroke or brain hemorrhage".

Johns favorite car, his 1989 firebird got completley wrecked and the couple didn't have insurance to pay for a replacement.

" He loved that car, It brought him back to the 80s when we were still young and free. Now the car is destroyed and its a shame, its one of the few things that brought pure joy out of him, it brought a passion out of him". Said Melba, Johns wife.

The 13 year old Roger Clementine suffered minor cuts to the face as well as facing charges of driving without a license.

" I really regret it, It was a terrible idea. I wanted to go to a party and my parents were out on a date, so I took their car and drove off. I had driven before so I thought it would be easy, but I didn't know how to drive on the street, so I crashed" said Roger.

His parents are very apologetic and are fixing to pay for the couples car with their insurance.

"I don't know what got over him, maybe its puberty or rebellious new attitude". Said Rogers mom.

The crash happened between 4:45 and 4:55

News Values